May 31, 2004

Rendition's Corner: Guide to Casino Poker Rooms by Rendition

Welcome to the first Rendition’s Corner article. I hope to get off my lazy butt and write a weekly column on whatever topic suits my fancy at that moment. The topic today is the white hot Texas Holdem Poker.

You’ve all read about Chris Moneymaker and last week’s winner of the 2004 World Series of Poker, Mr. Fossilman. This patent attorney from Connecticut took down the $5 million grand prize for first place. Not too shabby for playing cards.

We can now all look forward to watching ESPN re-runs of him with his strange reptile sun-glasses pumping fists fill of cash at 2AM morning for the next 12 months instead of watching our favorite late night infomercials. Oh fun. In the meantime, you can prepare for next year’s WSOP by sharpening your skills at these casino poker rooms. No matter what anyone tells you, the best way to improve is by playing good players in real-life. Internet sites can teach you the basics in betting and reading flops, but you need the experience of staring down your opponents and reading tells to have a viable chance (Moneymaker being the lucky exception that proves the rule). And these casinos are the way to do it.

Lucky for you, I slaved away the past year with a new poker addiction, gambling my life savings, tipping waitresses, and looking eye to eye to with hustling gamblers and Hollywood celebrities from coast to coast of this great country of ours to give you the skinny on the best places to play. It’s a tough job, but somebody had to do it.

Foxwoods, Connecticut
Smoking: No
Number of Tables: 76
Service: 3 (1-5)
Ambience: 4
Dealer Quality: 4
Player Quality: 4
URL: http://www.foxwoods.com/Gaming/Poker/

The largest casino in the world has one of the largest poker rooms in the world. That is the biggest advantage as there are plenty of tables and games to play. The ambience is basic, no frills, plenty of room, and clean.

I enjoyed my time at Foxwoods, the service was good and the competition was solid. Be careful, as there are many professionals lurking the crowd more than willing to take your money. Be sure to play a solid, tight aggressive game.

Borgata, Atlantic City
Smoking: No
Number of Tables: 34
Service: 5 (1-5)
Ambience: 5
Dealer Quality: 3
Player Quality: 3
URL: http://www.theborgata.com/

Do you want to be pampered? Do you want to play in the nicest, most gorgeous environment possible? The Borgata is your poker room them. Service is quick, the room is amazing with new tables, chairs, and sky high ceilings with large plasma TV screens all around to catch the latest game. This is the only place that has an automated computerized queue system, so you never have to keep asking the floor person to see how long you have to wait.

The dealers are bit raw, the players are a mixed bag of good and bad, but overall the total package is perfect. Add in the best luxurious casino hotel on the East Coast, you’re golden. Borgata often has $99 weekday hotel rates, take advantage of it.

One warning about the tournaments. Borgata seems to be using them as training for dealers, so be prepared for a flurry of rookie mistakes.

Bellagio, Las Vegas
Smoking: No
Number of Tables: 30
Service: 2 (1-5)
Ambience: 4
Dealer Quality: 3
Player Quality: 3
URL: http://www.bellagio.com/pages/gaming_poker.asp

With Bellagio’s reputation I expected much, much better. At first glance, the poker room looks beautiful with nice old Italian decor. However the upkeep is poor. I sat on FOUR different chairs and all of them were worn down and broken, where the seat kept swaying off tilt. When I tried, to tell a floor person about my problems they would ignore me and tell me to find an open seat.

The waitresses were SLOW and hardly ever came around, often they would mess up my order. The dealers can deal, but had off-putting, arrogant personalities. Even the players tended to be on the “jerk” side.

Maybe I just had a bad experience, but a search on the internet shows I’m not alone. The players I played with were very loose, I’m sure over time a tight aggressive player could clean house here. However with this kind of service, I rather spend my time in a place I can have more fun and not come out annoyed.

Mirage, Las Vegas
Smoking: No
Number of Tables: 31
Service: 4 (1-5)
Ambience: 4
Dealer Quality: 5
Player Quality: 5
URL: http://www.themirage.com/pages/gaming_poker.asp

This is my favorite poker room, next to the Borgata. The dealers are fun, have dynamic personalities, and best of all the most experienced. They hardly ever made mistakes. Service is solid and the tournaments are just the right size for the intermediate player.

The players are also fun and competitive. In just a few hours there, I struck up friendships with a few professional who were more than willing to give tips on my play. Best people, best tourneys, Mirage is the place to be. Famous people know this too, as in my time there James Woods and Ben Affleck were seeing playing on multiple occasions.

Trump Taj Mahal, Atlantic City
Smoking: No
Number of Tables: 50?
Service: 3 (1-5)
Ambience: 3
Dealer Quality: 4
Player Quality: 3
URL: http://www.trumptaj.com/casino/CasinoPoker.asp

This is one of the most famous poker rooms as shown in the Matt Damon classic, Rounders. However with the advent of new casinos, the Taj has passed its prime with a run-down look and chips that are basically falling apart. The dealers however are experienced and the quality of players are solid.

Harrahs Council Bluffs, Iowa
Smoking: Yes (open air with rest of the casino)
Number of Tables: around 7
Service: 3 (1-5)
Ambience: 2
Dealer Quality: 2
Player Quality: 3
URL: http://www.harrahs.com/our_casinos/cou/gaming/tables.html

This is the smallest casino during my tour with just a handful tables. Ambience is old, loud, and a bit tight on space. I got wiped out here as two professionals cleaned me out. The players tend to be really good professionals or really bad beginners.

Remember what they say, “if you can’t see the chump, YOU are the chump.” As a new offering for the casino, the dealers are inexperienced made a lot of mistakes. However if you’re in the Iowa area, you don’t have much choice to play poker other than here.

Harrahs, New Orleans
Smoking: Yes (open air with rest of casino)
Number of Tables: 20
Service: 3 (1-5)
Ambience: 3
Dealer Quality: 3
Player Quality: 1
URL: http://www.harrahs.com/our_casinos/nor/gaming/index.html

Two words. Easy money. Even though the service and ambience is average at best, this is the place to go to make your killing. A ton of older retired clientele and tourists and nary a professional in sight. I almost felt bad taking their money... well almost. The casino is right in the middle of downtown New Orleans, so make a part of your next Mardi Gras vacation.

So there you have it, a quick guide to a half-dozen casinos across the country. My favorites are the Mirage for fun, Borgata for ambience, Foxwoods for sheer size, and Harrah’s New Orleans for easy money.

I’d love to hear your feedback on my thoughts. Please, please write questions, your own experiences and casino poker room reviews on our discussion forum. I promise a quick reply on the forum. Till next time, shuffle up and deal. Permalink - Discuss